Warm greetings of joy to you!!!
Great excitement bubbles through me as I begin to write this newsletter … writing is spontaneous … Let’s talk about awakening …
So what is this about? Awakening to what, you may ask? And how does this fit in with Kundalini Yoga?
Awakening to who you truly are. Because while we are buying into what we are not, we simply suffer … maybe not initially, but eventually.
Awakening to your true self is incredible … exhilarating. The ultimate and only true union. Holding onto ideas of what you are not, feels restrictive, and we may ride that wave for a while, but ultimately it is unsatisfying. You know something is missing … something big. Something significant. And life will reveal this to you through stress.
So what is missing?
Some refer to it as loving yourself truly, unconditionally. Recognising the DIVINE in you, as you; that pulse of creative, blissful, centred, calm and infinite life itself …
There are many ways in which this search and ultimate need manifests.
Often I share about yogic perspectives in class, through various layers of perception we call the chakras; which are centres of consciousness that we can be aligned or misaligned with. Are we grounded? Are we ruled by fear? Are we flowing? Speaking our truth? Trusting our heart? Are we ok with uncertainty? Are we ok with our primal and higher selves?
For me it is also very simple. Here is a short cut.
The egoic self, the identified self as an individual, a pure focus on that, is being asleep, in other words not awake to the truth of who you are. Sometimes that sleep is ok and all we can ‘enjoy’ it for a while. We are not ready to let the false identity with the ego die. Yes, it is sometimes easy and obvious, other times it is so hard, letting go of egoic concepts it is like a part of you is dying. And so it is. And it is painful but hugely liberating. People will come into your life to help you with this, by triggering you to feel this!
Another way to look at it is to question your beliefs, starting to observe and become aware of the thoughts we regularly identify with, the repetitive nature of certain ideas… and the effects that have upon our way of being in the world. All thoughts have an energy and create a reverberation outward to then have it manifested.
These systems (of thought: conscious and unconscious) are extremely complex and the yogis have seen through them all.
Waking up is not about seeing auras, or the law of attraction, feeling energy or your healing abilities … these are wonderful experiences, yes!
… waking up it is about realising totally who/what you are and who/what you are NOT. It is not about your wealth or relationships or such things, although they reflect your belief systems and mirror your internal world. Ultimately though awakening is about dropping the ideas of ‘I know’ and realising beyond that .. then tapping into the vast field of infinite consciousness from which you are never separate. You realise you are not the doer. It is all one and the same Source/God/Field of Consciousness/Love/The Divine.
I notice that while I hold any belief ultimately, my ego is at play, and I am in my own limited prison and cannot, in that way, behold the expanded nature of what I truly am.
At this stage, right now, there is an acceleration for me to be dropping more and more concepts and to surrender even more … there seems an endless ocean for this, which means an endless way in which the egoic (false) sense of self is holding on and trying to keep a sense of identification. … it is seen and felt as suffering! I observe, I don’t enjoy it (those limiting beliefs), my being wants to release i/them .. and it is! That is grace …
As many spiritual masters explain in so many ways, while we are identified with the ego self, there is attachment, and hence suffering, limitation and there is a believing in a lie about the ultimate reality.
You know it is time to shift when the suffering becomes obvious and the false belief becomes uncomfortable to hold on to anymore! Thank God too!
The stress of holding on and resisting our invitation to spiritual growth (conscious expansion) – and hence peace, alignment, joy, bliss, awakening – manifests in many ways, uniquely for humans: as stress in the body, tightness, fears, anger, tears, resistance, passions that take much of your focus, looking to compensate with other things like perhaps food, drink, alcohol, sex, people, entertainment, new partners, internet, intense hobbies and fixations, gambling… risk taking behaviours … depression … blame … etc .. these are all unique for us all.
And that is totally ok. It is part of the journey and of the process too.
They are here. If they are. And seeing this is awareness.
So all this is part of the human spectrum and arises in all of us from time to time, to certain degrees, whether we recognise it or not.
So how does Kundalini Yoga fit into this and helps us to awaken from illusion and delusion?
See my little reflections below …
Please know I am merely using words to describe my experience and seeing … using words to describe intricate details that could take up volumes to fill an entire library.
This awareness used to stop me from wanting to write. For this is just ‘my’ perspective. Yours is equally as valid and divine!
For this is a limitation and inside me dwells some perfectionist as a personality … I see this and hence write anyway … it is seen that everything is a tiny part of the entire incredible experience we call life … nothing can truly touch it in words … so please rest assured that your version is as relevant as mine and anybody elses’ … that I respect your unique difference as another way for the divine consciousness to dance … there is no inherent judgement here at all … judgement may arise in moments, different preferences may be seen, but even that is illusion ultimately. Seeing these and not identifying is the key. We live in a vast field of collective (oneness) consciousness. What is yours or mine is really not separate.
My challenge has been that I began having higher expectations and projections of someone very close to me … and often our most intimate partners are here to show and reflect anything that most other people would not bring up in us … this is a great gift, and hard work, and supremely rewarding… the ultimate gift are those who trigger us the most! While we can be triggered, there is seeing to happen and ego to release … how wonderful!!!! I bow to that and all triggers and triggerers!